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Why Dating Scripts and Strategies Don't Work!
In other words: Theory and Psychology, 11 2. If non-restrictive sexual norms are regarded positively they may be called "sexual freedom", "sexual liberation", or "free love". It can be linked to theories of sexual desire but is critical of the tendency to stress the purely biological aspects of desire. Interestingly, and somewhat ironically, it was this highly gendered convention regarding the propriety of who should ask and who should pay within the context of modern courtship that ultimately transformed the terms date and dating. Of course this is not to suggest that dating should be understood only as a solution of last resort to the romantic problems inherent to urban overpopulation. Scripts refer to social functions. Indeed, as historian George Chauncey has noted in a slightly different context, privacy could often only be found in public in many densely populated American cities during the early twentieth century. As a cause for dating's victory over calling, the automobile's significance has probably been somewhat exaggerated. The caller who regularly was not received quickly learned the limits of her family's social status, and the lady at home thus, in some measure, protected herself and her family from the social confusion and pressures engendered by the mobility and expansiveness of late nineteenth-century America. Among men the shift toward dating in the modern sense was regarded with some ambivalence, at least initially. Sexual norms are constantly changing and normal sexual behavior is a spectrum and cannot be rigidly defined. So in this sense calling was also a more—or at least differently—public experience than modern dating. Nevertheless, and despite popular resistance to the notion that dating primarily serves as a mechanism for sorting society into pairs whose individual members serve one another's social and economic interests in various ways, there is a general consensus that the ritual itself can be both highly rewarding and utterly exhausting in emotional, physical, and financial terms. First and most significantly, calling was, in one sense, considerably more private than modern dating.
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